Hi my friend,,,
It has been years since I wrote to you that letter, but believe me, once I read it back it filled me with so much anxiety and sorrow, for so many reasons.
let me start be saying I'm sorry to you and for you to be in such a position with so much on your shoulders and many expectations. It seems like I was growing up too fast and out of hands,, out of my hands at least. I looked up to you as always , I wanted the answers I needed growing up, not realizing that you too were growing up. You are simply just a human as I am.
It was normal to grow apart ,,, we as a person grow apart of ourselves once or twice in our lifetime and I know how hard it feels and how much harder it is to watch a loved one going through that phase and not being able to do anything to help them but to pray.
Looking back, I dunno the answers of most of those questions and I don't think I knew the answer back then either.
Now that I'm older and have a little bit more knowledge than before, I understand the meaning of a friend and the qualifications of a best friend and you my friend check all the boxes of the best friend so can I get my best friend I ever had back?
I know now that it's OK not to tell you every thing I know at it's moment. It's OK not to tell you all my secrets. It's OK to hid my sorrows, tears and pain as long as I know that you'll always have my back and that you won't ever let go of my hand after knowing those tiny and large stupid mistakes I've made cause I didn't believe your advice and listened to my words over yours. It's so OK for you not to have all the answers, cause if anyone has to know,,, it's me and if I don't then no one is obligated to.
All what I'm asking for is for your door to be still open for me to always knock on and for you to always answer cause if you didn't I wouldn't know who to go to. After all these years,, maybe sometimes you weren't my first person to go to but you are definitely the only one I want to be with when I'm at my wit's end.
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